Thursday, 18 November 2010

Competitive parenting

I am not a competitive person by nature. I was very good at athletics when I was younger but always lacked that ruthless competitive nature you need to really push yourself. I've always had a fairly laid back approach to winning and losing and life in general until recently...

It all started when Izzy started school and the teacher said that all the reception children would get their first reading books sometime in the New Year when she felt they were ready. She made it clear that it was not a race and that we should not compare our children to others who got a reading book first. I joked with my friends at the time that clearly it was a race and that we would all be checking out each others book bags to see who got their book first. I WAS joking but if I'm honest I've been feeling a bit competitive about the whole thing ever since. Izzy got her first word bag the other day and I had to restrain myself from punching the air when I saw it. We have been practicing and I've had to really check myself when writing comments in the book that comes with it. What I want to say in capital letters is 'clearly my child should be one of the first to get a reading book!' Luckily I'm able to realise that this new found competitive streak is not a good thing and I'm not madly coaching Izzy in order to ensure she gets her book first (honest!) but the competitive streak is definitely there and I don't like it! Anyone else feel like this??

Finally a bit of sewing is happening. A personalised apron for Isobel. I hope she likes it!!

Also congratulations to my friend Carole who recently had a craft/tea/cake sale at her house in aid of Home-Start (a charity I work for that supports parents with children under 5). She raised over £300. I took some of my stuff along to and sold about £85 worth which was fantastic and very unexpected so I was very happy to donate 15% back to Home-Start.

More sewing tomorrow. Another apron for 'Phoebe' and I still need to get those Christmas decorations sorted for the swap.


  1. Love the apron and I was a volunteer with home start with two families and enjoyed it very much until the day my charge left me 'in charge' of one hyper youngster and her new baby and went swanning off for the day - I was nearly tearing my hair out when she arrived back. But eh we all need space now and again don't we? - but not a full day when you said you were going out for an hour.... :(
    Beverley x

  2. My first son is/was very bright and I'll admit to feeling smug rather than competitive but have been on the receiving end of the antics of a competitive parent! It was so extreme it was ridiculous, (writing to the teacher with a chart showing how many new words her son had successfully read and demanding to know why her son wasn't on the same level as Louis!) My second son has special needs which is a whole different ball game, now, even the slightest achievement has me punching the air with triumph! Wait until she's reading books by herself, it's such a pleasure to see. xx
    PS. Well done on selling your stuff, nothing unexpected about that.

  3. I suffered with competative mothers when we lived in Berkshire and I am sure it didnt help with my PND. I ahve become the most uncompetative mum that I actually go out of my way to avoid people who are, but it is hard.

    I love the apron, so I am she I will!

  4. My rule is: don't ask about other children! Just be pleased for what your own are doing without measuring them against other people. I'm lucky in that my children get the bus so I don't have to encounter random competitiveness and my friends and I try to avoid discussing progress. Very cute apron - the buttons are so sweet.


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